And we're back with the third installment of the 6 Core Relationships - those that must be cultivated if we want to continue to grow and fulfill our potential. Personally, I have to constantly work on all of these.
We've already discussed the core relationships you have with yourself (self-leadership), work (your 360-degree influence and effectiveness with your colleagues) and loved ones (your family and those who matter the most). In that blog, I have tips on improving any of those you think may be struggling.
Today, we'll talk about 3 more - your inner circle, the outside community and world around you, and your higher power. Let's get started...
Core Relationship #4: Inner Circle
These are the advisors, confidants, mentors, coaches, co-laborers, and friends who shape us both directly and indirectly. There are members of my inner circle who I pay to be a part of it, there are friends I work out and ride bikes with multiple days a week where mutual ongoing support is recognized and given. And of course, there is one member of my inner circle in particular, the one I'm married to, who is the best coach I know. She shows me my blind spots regularly and I wouldn't be who I am without her!
Unfortunately, and this happens more often with men, many people describe not having much of an inner circle at all. Sometimes this is due to personality. Other times it's due to problems with trust and being uncomfortable with feelings. Others simply feel alone or isolated in an environment they don't feel like they fully fit in.
The path forward can start by finding someone you can talk to about something you don't normally talk to people about.
If you often feel the pressure to make your leadership decisions alone, start by talking with someone you trust about your hopes and fears related to the decisions you need to make next.
If you tackle all of your hobbies solo but want to take your fitness to the next level, find a group that shares your interest, even if it's intimidating. There is no way I would have accomplished my cycling feats without jumping in with others who were much stronger than me. The greater benefit is how we support each other in all aspects of life.
If you struggle with anger, frustration, shame, or anxiety, find a trusted mentor or professional you can be real with.
I do not believe in the social media trend today of sharing everything with everyone. That's toxic and dysfunctional. I do believe in having someone you can share close to everything with. That's essential.
Core Relationship #5: Community/the Outside World
Our relationship with our community and the outside world is largely determined by whether we are mission-driven or "me" driven.
❓ Are you simply trying to get as much from the world as you can or are you trying to give in a way that makes a difference?
Giving is, and always will be, much more satisfying than receiving.
Are you spending your time and energy bunkering in and protecting yourself from the dangers that exist or are you praying for those who are creating the danger and investing in ways to actively make a difference?
How we relate to the world impacts how we feel about it and has a great bearing on whether we invest our lives in self or mission.
Core Relationship #6: Higher Power
As a person of faith, God is my higher power. Whether you claim to follow Jesus, or another religion, this may or may not be the case for you. Whether or not we attend religious services is not necessarily indicative of who or what we are actually placing our hope in.
❓ The core question is, who or what are you depending on for your identity, purpose, and overall provision?
Is it you? Is it the world’s perception of you? The security your possessions bring? Proving your significance through your achievements? Is it God?
Can your higher power truly deliver?
Identifying and clarifying your relationship with your higher power is key to leading and living at your highest potential. Much of the anxiety, frustration and discouragement people experience today is because they have not figured this one out.
With all six of these relationships, it's never ok to overlook or stop investing in them. These are all relationships that will remain a part of your life. And they are important.
Interested in making sure you continue to grow? We are too! Schedule time with Bob to start your journey today!